Justice after Marriage

Girl tortured by inlaws

Today’s provoking thought behind writing this post is about how childhood matters in the making of a person. There are many factors that parents or guardians usually try to inculcate in the kids like teaching good manners, telling what is & is not expected from them, what is good & bad, how they should behave, a sense of morality, etc. In addition to all this what the environment of a child also teaches them subconsciously is the way the elders around them behave. Children after all copy what they see. It all starts within the family.

Let us start with the children of the house. Expectations are more from the girl child than the boy. Expectation of polite behaviour, lending a helping hand to mom, doing some odd chores of the household regularly, keeping the room neat & tidy, etc. Okay! I am not denying that boys are left at peace either by some of the good parents but the compulsive disciplinarian & sacrificial-expectation attitude is often dumped on the girl. Well, I am not saying there is anything wrong or right in this but it puts a big question in front of me that when you raise a girl in such sobriety & expect her to be dignified why is it that she is made to compromise when she leaves her home & goes to the in-laws’? Why does the society deny aggressive support when it calls for after her marriage!?

It is a common scene in India to see girls suffering after getting married at their in-laws’ & more so, this is an expected scenario! People do not find it strange when their daughter, sister, cousin, relative, friend faces unjust behaviour in terms of equality, decency, basic right of freedom of speech, to go out with her friends, to talk to her loved ones at her chosen times and so on. In fact in many Indian households girls are treated with lot of care & love just because they will be subjected to hardships after marriage in her new ‘home.’ Is this way of parenting & healthy!?

I feel flabbergasted at this painful & ruthless scenario where there is no question of justice or even basic humanity towards these poor young girls who leave their homes, comfort zone, give away their lives only in hope to get some love, care & security. Basic things that a marriage so called guarantees.

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